Sunday, January 29, 2006

Staten Island Memorial

My Artist’s date didn't go as planned.

For my Artist’s date I planned to go to Battery Park but it didn’t work out that way. When I got to the ferry I realized that I had a half hour wait; I hadn't brought a book with me --- another planning error.

I really didn't want to wait so I decided to follow the walkway along the shore. After I passed the Ferry Terminal and the ballpark there was a sign: Staten Island Sept11 Memorial. I followed the sign. From the stairway its curved walls stand against the Manhattan skyline as if they are wings ready to take flight. Along the walls are carved the names of Staten Island residents who died during 9/11 and remembrances left by visitors. As I stood at the monument and looked out over the water I could see where the towers had been.…

After visiting the monument I continued up the walk, watched the ships go by and listened to the trees talk. I tried to imagine what it would have been like to have been born a tree.…as I looked at the deep scars along their trunks, I realized trees have pain and tragedy also.

Thursday, January 26, 2006

When I First Started Going to the 9/11 program

When I first started going to the World Trade Center Healing Services I went for the acupuncture. I thought the Reiki was kind of weird. My ex does energy work and I was clear that having energy work done to one was a unpleasant thing. I really didn't want anything to do with it.

Now I’ve been converted, I go for the Reiki treatments. The Reiki and acupuncture complement each other. I ring the bell the receptionist lets us in; we sign in, and then walk down the short hall to a room where music is playing softly. There are two large windows on two of the walls, which are overlooking Maiden Lane and Broadway. Peter the Reiki master greets us with a beatific smile. Besides being a Reiki master he’s also a musician and composer. If I get a chance I would really like to paint his portrait.

Peter gives us a small packet with an alcohol wipe. I wipe both ears going over them twice to make sure I don't miss any spots. I take my favorite chair in front of the window overlooking Maiden Lane. Peter places the needles in my ears with such a gentle touch that I scarcely feel them. I immediately start to feel a sense of relaxing peacefulness. He holds his hand over my head. The feelings during Reiki are individual and different for each person but for me, I very often feel soothing warmth and a sense of blessing as if I have been encircled by sunlight. Eyes closed, I slide into a deep and relaxing peacefulness and lose all sense of time. About 30 minutes later, he gently touches my shoulder and as I come back to reality he removes the needles from my ears.

The feeling of peace and serenity lingers for several days. Amazingly, it also relieves my headache and my back pain when my medication doesn't work.

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Artist Way Tasks

Five people I admire:
Amber Rose for her grace, compassion, beauty and serenity.
Hillary Clinton because she has made a difference in peoples lives and her courage and grace.
Peter Goldbeck for his integrity, compassion, wisdom, spirit and his ability to make a difference.
My Dad for his integrity as well as his ability and commitment to making a difference in the world. Also for his artistic eye.
Candi Morgan for her courage, her effervescence and her grace.

Five people I would like to have meet:
Joan of Arc

Monday, January 23, 2006

Beginning week three

Made a strong start early in last week. Read the chapter and started in on the assignments, but physically it wasn’t such a good week. I didn’t feel well enough to get all the assignments done. Saturday I still wasn’t well enough to do my Artist Way check in or my three pages. I missed the pages a couple of other days also. But I feel that I am benefiting already in spite of being less focused and more sporadic than I would like to be. This week while reading chapter three of The Artist Way I was encouraged when I read “Growth is an erratic forward movement: two steps forward, one step back. Remember that and be very gentle with yourself. A creative recovery is a healing process. You are capable of great things on Tuesday, but on Wednesday you may slide backward. This is normal.” Julia Cameron

Sunday, January 22, 2006


Acrylic on watercolor paper
I learned to write poetry when I was home-schooling my son. Poetry never made sense to me when I was in school and I was determined that my son was going to learn it. I took him to the Poetry House on Spring Street. I also bought books on writing poetry and we read them together. Then I asked my Mother for help and she taught both Sam and me a lot about poetry. Rhyming is really hard for me. I've written a couple of really awful poems that rhyme. My son is better at rhyming than I am; he rhymes easily.

I was kind of shocked when I was able to write my first poem and I still don’t really grasp the difference between free verse and prose. I am grateful to my mother for all her hard work in teaching my son and me to write poetry and to both my mother and father for the hours they spent reciting poetry to me when I was growing up.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Five Other Lives

The five other lives I picked for this week:
a dancer
a healer
a musician

I’ve borrowed a guitar and I’ve decided not to worry about sounding great I will just worry about having fun with it.

For my artist date this week I decided to go to the Everything Goes Book CafĂ©. I ended up staying much longer than I had meant to - almost two hours. I ordered a latte and wrote in my notebook for a while then I browsed their used books. I ended up buying six books; they were so inexpensive I couldn’t resist. The most I paid for any of the books was three dollars. I bought The Trumpet Of The Swan and One Man's Meat, both by E B White, I Touch The Earth The Earth Touches Me by Hugh Prather, Reflection on A Gift of Watermelon Pickle...And Other Modern Verse Loveroot by Erica Jong, Welcome To Temptation by Jennifer Crusie. I plan to go back; it was a wonderful place to write with plenty of tempting books.

Monday, January 16, 2006

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Artist Way starting week two

Today I started reading week two in The Artist Way. Reading the section about crazymakers, immediately my ex flashed into my mind. Living with him was destructive. Repeatedly he bragged that he deliberately created chaos. He said that creating chaos gave him control and kept everyone off balance. To quote him, “I thrive on chaos”
It’s a relief not to be living in chaos anymore.

Task Three –List twenty things I enjoy doing and the last time I did them
I had a really hard time getting started with this task, I thought I was never going to come up with twenty things I almost gave up at five, but I managed to finish it and actually ended up with two extra things.

Painting - ?
Walking on the beach – January 4, 2006
Drinking a hot cup of tea – January 15, 2006
Listening to music – January 15, 2006
Sitting in a garden in the sunshine - ?
Having an acupuncture treatment – December , 2005
Visiting with friends and family – January 15, 2006
Looking at art – January 14, 2006
Holding my nephew – January 6, 2006
Collecting rocks – 2000
Going for a Reiki treatment – January 5, 2006
Taking art classes - ?
Getting my hair done -?
Feeding seagulls - ?
Taking a nap in the sunshine - ?
Watching a lightening storm - ?
Smelling flowers - ?
Writing – January 15, 2006
Buying a new lipstick - ?
Sculpting -?
Canoeing - ?
Raising baby chickens and geese - 1994

Thirsty For Spring

I don’t feel deep today. Actually I feel very superficial, wanting to escape any deep or serious thoughts. I blame the snow for this. When it snows I want to escape winter and the cold. I want to crawl deep into my blankets and hibernate until spring.

I look out the window and see a pair of doves huddled on the birdfeeder. The wind is blowing gusts of snow around them. I feel sorry for them. Should I invite them inside out of the cold? I’ll remind them not to drop the shells from their seed on the floor, to wipe their feet and their beaks and to use the toilet instead of the carpet. We can listen to music on the CD player; have warm tea with crackers while we wait for spring together. Many birds and people flew south for the winter but New York is my home and I have begun to lose my taste for traveling and new places. As wonderful as they sound, traveling is exhausting.

There is so much of New York I haven’t seen yet but right now I don’t even want to get out of bed much less go out the front door. Seventy or eighty degrees would be so wonderful. Sunshine, apple blossoms, daffodils, pear trees blooming, warm breezes, tall glasses of ice tea and sunbeams, warm spring rain… I am thirsty for spring.

I was walking on the beach a few days ago. What a delight, even though it involved a lot of shivering! I was buried under long johns, sweaters, coat, scarf, hat and gloves but it still involved shivering. The cold chased me off the beach much too soon… I am still thirsty for spring.

Saturday, January 14, 2006

The Artist Way

Years ago I began reading “The Artist Way” by Julia Cameron. I began following her recommendation of writing daily which she calls “morning pages.” The morning pages always make a big difference in my life when I do them but I have the worst time sticking with it. I am so totally not a morning kind of person. Today I found out about an online Artist Way group of bloggers. I immediately signed up to become part of the group.
While there have been times when I have worked as part of a class or with the companionship of another artist, more often I work in isolation and I haven’t been part of an Artist Way group before. I have been writing the morning pages again but need the motivation to keep them up and I am looking forward to working as part of a group.


The day is new.
It vibrates with freshness
purified by the rain.
Rain has washed away the snow.
The earth is freshly laundered.
Drops of water sparkle
on the windowpane.
Mist races across the hill
dressing the naked trees
in ethereal white robes.
A crow flies through the mist.
The fresh washed air
permeates my spirit
cleansing me.
A raindrop
runs across my fingers….
across my hand
down my wrist.
From his perch
at the edge of the wood
the sharp-eyed hawk sits
guarding the bird feeder.
The air is entwined
with the smells
of fresh rain and wood smoke.
copyright 2006

Thursday, January 12, 2006


Still life --- My Lunch
Study done at the Art Students League in a class taught by Peter Golfinopoulos

Tuesday, January 10, 2006


This piece was finished today; it had its own direction both the composition and the color intensity changed dramatically while I was working on it I just followed where the painting wanted to go. If you will look carefully you will find a number of question marks that I discovered as things came together.

I don’t really understand this piece. I think it is about the cat, but I am no longer sure, I simply followed along while it drew itself.

Mixed media.

Saturday, January 07, 2006


pain tears my chest
my pancreas moans
a blanket of graynesss covers me
I slip down into its warmth and pull it tight around me
sorrow is eating my heart
I will not think of you
numb I am wraped in the comfort of grayness
I will shead no more tears for you

Thursday, January 05, 2006


Sam and I went to Reiki and acupuncture at the World Trade Center Healing Services on Broadway in Manhattan. It had been over three weeks since I had my last Reiki treatment. That is way to long to go without Reiki. This time it was especially wonderful I felt serene and totally at peace with the world and myself. It was an incredible relaxing feeling. Afterwards Sam and I went around the corner, where Sam bought some game-cards at the comic shop, and then we went to "Klatch", a coffee bar. I wanted some tea. They have really outstanding treats; Sam had one of their chocolate cookies with powdered sugar and a slice of their cherry pie. It looked so good, I had to taste his pie. I didn't believe it could be any good. Most places serve heavy flavorless pie crust but this crust was delicious, very close to as good as my brother makes, and my brother makes the best piecrust I've ever eaten.